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"It’s a fine line between pleasure and pain." - Divinyls

When it comes to managememnt I’ve seen, and done, a lot of things I’d cringe at today. The best of intentions from a manager has had distastrous effects on their staff.

One example recently was a colleague of mine had just introduced themselves at a workshop. Now this person had the best of intentions and their heart is, I believe, in the right place. But, as this example will show, even sincere people can be sincerely wrong.

During their introduction, at a communications skills workshop, they mentioned they were looking to get a lot from the day because they experience conflict with people, his staff in particular. One of who was in the room, who he actually named as having conflict with. Ouch!

Can you imagine being in a room where your boss states publicly that they are having conflict with you? Luckily, the facilitator, asked them to re-frame (or re-word) that part of the introduction. But, to my mind, the damage had been done.

The rationale for this was openness: "We want to create an environment of openness and transparency."

I fully support such environments - when all parties are aware of what may happen, are ready and in agreement. However, I would be against this type of openness as it has the potential to paint people in a light they do not wish.

A manager’s good intentions (pleasure) has only caused embarrassment (pain) and, perhaps dealt a shocking blow to trust between the two. It is, indeed, a fine line.

If You’re a Manager …

• Being a manager doesn’t mean some rules don’t apply to your level of the "food chain."
• It is your role to uphold the rules and ensure they are abided by.
• If you’re going to be "open and transparent" in public, apply that only to yourself and not to others. You cannot assume everyone thinks the same way you do. In fact, they probably don’t.
• Listen to how staff communicate with you if they have been put in an awkward situation.
• Empathise - put yourself in their position. It will provide context.

If You’re Staff …

• In terms of "openness and transparency" try and understand what the company is endeavouring to do.
• Work with the manager, not against them and get on to their level; as well as letting them know how you feel about it.
• Clarify the ground rules. However, you don’t need to be embarrrassed by anyone and they need to know that.
• Be direct with any feedback if you have been put in an awkward situation and remain objective.You can be objective in telling them how you feel, or felt.
• If they don’t listen at first, be firm and repeat the situation and how you felt about it.

Being open is great, but it can be harmful if that openness includes other without their permission.

Oh, and listen to the Divinyls’ song, it’s great!

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