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"It’s a fine line between pleasure and pain." - Divinyls

When it comes to managememnt I’ve seen, and done, a lot of things I’d cringe at today. The best of intentions from a manager has had distastrous effects on their staff.

One example recently was a colleague of mine had just introduced themselves at a workshop. Now this person had the best of intentions and their heart is, I believe, in the right place. But, as this example will show, even sincere people can be sincerely wrong.

During their introduction, at a communications skills workshop, they mentioned they were looking to get a lot from the day because they experience conflict with people, his staff in particular. One of who was in the room, who he actually named as having conflict with. Ouch!

Can you imagine being in a room where your boss states publicly that they are having conflict with you? Luckily, the facilitator, asked them to re-frame (or re-word) that part of the introduction. But, to my mind, the damage had been done.

The rationale for this was openness: "We want to create an environment of openness and transparency."

I fully support such environments - when all parties are aware of what may happen, are ready and in agreement. However, I would be against this type of openness as it has the potential to paint people in a light they do not wish.

A manager’s good intentions (pleasure) has only caused embarrassment (pain) and, perhaps dealt a shocking blow to trust between the two. It is, indeed, a fine line.

If You’re a Manager …

• Being a manager doesn’t mean some rules don’t apply to your level of the "food chain."
• It is your role to uphold the rules and ensure they are abided by.
• If you’re going to be "open and transparent" in public, apply that only to yourself and not to others. You cannot assume everyone thinks the same way you do. In fact, they probably don’t.
• Listen to how staff communicate with you if they have been put in an awkward situation.
• Empathise - put yourself in their position. It will provide context.

If You’re Staff …

• In terms of "openness and transparency" try and understand what the company is endeavouring to do.
• Work with the manager, not against them and get on to their level; as well as letting them know how you feel about it.
• Clarify the ground rules. However, you don’t need to be embarrrassed by anyone and they need to know that.
• Be direct with any feedback if you have been put in an awkward situation and remain objective.You can be objective in telling them how you feel, or felt.
• If they don’t listen at first, be firm and repeat the situation and how you felt about it.

Being open is great, but it can be harmful if that openness includes other without their permission.

Oh, and listen to the Divinyls’ song, it’s great!

Everyone loves a holiday.

Most people have holidays around the same time, whether they believe in the holiday is a different matter and a personal issue I don’t want to address here.

I know on a few forums around Christmas time there is always the debate about who to send cards to and what to send. (Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Happy Hanukkah etc).

Call me simplistic but I could care less.

If someone sends me a card, they are thinking of me, and that’s great!

It means, to me, we did enough stuff this year to warrant a contact of some sort. Maybe it wasn’t this year but a year or two ago. Who cares? I got a card and that’s great.

It means they wish me well. I like that.

So why am I writing this now?

Well, I also know that at Holiday time, we are all busy sorting through a whole bunch of stuff that just puts more and more pressure on us.

So I’m suggesting you write your cards now! Yes, NOW!

Don’t post them, diarise that for a day that you’re comfortable with. But write them out now. You’ll have more time to think carefully about the recipients and you’ll get the writing part out of the way well before the pressure is on.

Birthday Cards Count Too

While you’re at it, write some birthday cards too. Maybe a year’s worth and then sort them into monthly divisions. When the month arrives, pick up the wad of cards and drop them in the post box. Done! All you need, besides the cards, envelopes and stamps is some high -tech gear like a shoebox, or an elastic band. (Tutorials on how to use them will be posted soon! )

One of the things I am trying to do is provide real information and value to my readers. I can see from my Feedburner stats (numbers tell the truth, sad to say!) that there is some improvement to be done. However, to improve my blogging I’m always looking for tips and ideas.

John Bennett over at ThingsThatAreFun.com sent me this and I thought it was worth a try. Plus, you get to know a whole lot of ideas that can help your blogging and become more effective.

John found this over at Cash Quests so let’s see how it goes:

-Start Copy-

It’s very simple. When this is passed on to you, copy the whole thing, skim the list and put a * star beside those that you like. (Check out especially the * starred ones.)

Add the next number (1. 2. 3. 4. 5., etc.) and write your own blogging tip for other bloggers.

Try to make your tip general.

Then tag 10 others at the bottom to keep the list going

Just think– if 10 people start this, the 10 people pass it onto another 10 people, you have 100 links already!

1. Look, read, and learn. *****
-http://www.neonscent.com

2. Be, EXCELLENT to each other. *****
-http://www.bushmackel.com/

3. Don’t let money change ya! ****
-http://www.therandomforest.info

4. Always reply to your comments. *****
-http://chattiekat.com

5. Spell check is your friend. ***** (damn right!!!! (see last post) )
- http://thingsbymike.com

6. Be the blog. ****
- http://www.meandmydrum.com/

7. Your readers are your treasure. **
- http://www.brownbaron.com/blog/

8. Titles Are Everything **
- http://www.realitywired.com

9. Your blog. Your money. Your rules. **
- Cash Quests

10. Content is King! *
- Things That Are Fun

11. Write Well! *

- www.billwallaceonline.com

-End Copy-

I’m going to pass along the tag to some sites I enjoy now:

- Freelance Switch - http://www.freelanceswitch.com

- Miles Burke - http://www.milesburke.net/blog

- Merlin Mann - http://www.43folders.com

- David Allen - http://www.davidco.com

- Leo Babauta - http://www.zenhabits.net

- John Bennett - http://www.thingsthatarefun.com/ (Of course , get on over there!)

- Mark at http://www.meandmydrum.com

So there you go, feel free to copy the list and add to it.  Let’s see where this goes.

One of the biggest things you’ll see on productivity websites is planning. And for good reason - good planning allows us to focus on the things most important to us and achieve things rather than just waiting for the day to end.

With this in mind, and with a degree of personal frustration about how I was managing my time while I am building up a solo business, I decided to plan my Next"Perfect" Day and determine to meet the goals I set myself. I’ve listed it below, word for word, so you know the detail I went to.

And, lo and behold, I achieved it!

Now most people would say "Well, duh! With that much planning who wouldn’t?" But that was the point. By simply having a clear mind prior to the day itself, I was able to put in the things I had to do. And they got done. Not so special, except when there are 100’s of things competing for your attention, it’s not a bad effort.

Maybe you don’t need to go to this level of detail, but I found it quite empowering to actually focus on what I wanted to do, specifically, and then work diligently towards it.

One of the keys I realised as I made the list was I knew I had to prepeare stuff the previous night to ensure I had the best chance of achieving my goals. So that was something else I had to consider.

It also brought back that good old saying about planning:

Proper Preparation Prevents a Pretty Poor Performance.

MY NEXT PERFECT DAY

6am   Walk 20-30 mins

6:30   Solitude 15 mins

6:45   Breakfast (Juice and Psyllium husks, porridge or muesli [I had porridge], coffee [short macchiato] )

7:30   Work travel

8:15   Work - set objective for this session - write two marketing letters for client

10:00 Snack - fruit / baked beans / yoghurt (1 of …)

10:10 Work - set objectives for this session - review letters, commence brochure

12:30 Lunch - (walk 15 mins) Nuts, fruit, salmon

1:00 Set objectives - complete brochure draft for client

3:00 Snack (see above) and walk

3:15 Work - set objectives - make lest of household chores. Pick one and start!

5:30 Home travel

6:15 Dinner

7:30 Solitude and review day

7:50 Relax

10:00 Retire

I expect many of the standard breaks to become habitual over time. I’ve added them here becasue I generally get caught up being busy that I forget the snack time. And the snack times, I’m told, are good for weight loss, so it’s not a fetish for snacks, it’s about eating well.

P.S. I also just want to apologise to anyone who has already read this post and has come back for whatever reason. I found so many spelling errors in this post I actually went red from embarrassment! I really do apologise. It gives an impression of sloppy writing which I am trying to be diligent to avoid.

One of the key skills for a manager is the skill of communication. And a key skill in effective communication is to have a realistic perspective of each party’s views.

It is now possible to assess our skills before a highly sensitive meeting and then immediately after to ensure we are delivering in line with our intent.

This new ‘mirror’ technology allows managers a ‘reality check’ just before they meet with the individual or team. It is based around how the manager sees themselves when compared to the team or person they are meeting with. It often helps to soften the situation and even relieves some of the tension.

Stage One

The ‘mirror’ can be used simply by clicking a link, opening a new window and turning part of the PC screen into a mirror - allowing the manager to view themselves fair and square in the eye prior to the meeting. This ‘viewing’ is intended to help the manager see how the other party may view them and allow the manager to take steps to improve their communication by this private but effective feedback.

Stage Two

Stage two is similar to stage one. A second link is provided to allow the manager some self reflection after the meeting and to determine if they can still look themself in the eye and agree they have done the right thing ethically and in good faith. Some managers report they feel like they could have improved their performance after viewing themself in the second mirror and begin to take steps to that improvement. Others see no difference and continue on as normal. Not always to their, or their staff’s, benefit.

Trial Version

To trial the new mirror technology a manager needs to be ready to attend a sensitive meeting and be prepared to not take themselves too seriously, thus eliminating a "Them v Us’ situation. A sure way to ruin effective communication.

After the meeting, the Manager clicks on the second link, ready to self examine and, perhaps agree that there may be room for communication improvement.

Mirror 1 - A good manager will see a normal view of themselves. Image may vary if intentions and message do not match.

Mirror 2 - A good manager who delivered a clear, concise message, taking into account dignity of the other party will see a normal view of themselves.

 

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